My late friend, Phil, was imperious. He lived out the cliche, “looking down his nose” at people. Whenever he spoke he tilted his head back, and in his best Ivy Leaguish speech, could put you down with pain and agony. That’s what made him so lovable. He was truly one of my best friends for many years, although there were times I wanted to spill my coffee on his newly-pressed slacks and newly-polished shoes. I would give anything to have him back again; it was great fun to joust with him.
But Phil represented the term imperious to a tee. He had an answer for everything, and … he was always correct. He was my corporation treasurer for several years and that made it especially frustrating when he started to tilt his silver-haired head back and we all knew what was coming next. Some people took him too seriously and became angry with him. I just knew him well enough to laugh at him/ with him. He respected our friendship enough to laugh with me, but it was always an interior laugh; an imperious person never gives away (his) amusement, especially when he is trying to win a disagreement.
Imperiousness is not tolerated by the public, for the most part. There are exceptions. William F. Buckley was a consummately imperious person. Born to a billionaire family and educated at the finest of schools (one of my alma maters, Yale, among them) he, like my friend, Phil, mastered the technique of lifting the head and staring down his patrician nose at a questioner or debater. He held the now-oxymoronic classification of being an intelligent conservative. I detested most of his political and economic judgments, but I respected him greatly, knowing that he arrived at his opinions through the use of reason and intelligence. He respected disagreement and welcomed debate. (However, he, too, won 99.9% of the time, particularly if he was the host.)
It is said that Thomas E. Dewey lost the presidential race to Harry S Truman because he was haughty, and maybe imperious. His manner was that of a Chicago lawyer, it was said, and the American voters didn’t welcome that kind of affect in their president.* Strange, as they had welcomed FDR three times as President, and his imperious posture, language, and credential was hard to ignore. He was almost a caricature of haughtiness, but he, like Buckley, was intelligent and had a compassion for the people.
I guess the message is not to judge the imperious ones. They just might turn out to be the right people for the times.
*My memory of Governor Dewey was that of him stepping on my toes when he rose from his chair to ascend the podium as he was introduced by my father to speak at a rally in my hometown when I was just a kid. It hurt!
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